sunset boulevard

sunset from waikiki

in case you haven't been following along on IG, i'm back from my hawaiian holiday! what a amazing way to celebrate the start of a new year..i think i may have created my own new tradition. since all i ever dream of are tan lines and sunshine, this island paradise delivered on every level and left me wanting more (north shore to be exact).

i was stressing about sharing pics because i didn't want the entire thing posted on the book but mom and the fam wanted to see pics and they don't have IG. i remembered seeing a post about chatbooks and boom. one day later i had a book ordered of all the pics i posted from the trip AND it was SIX dollars. since, i spent every last cent i could on goodies from the land of sunshine.

so yay for chatbooks (which i will be ordering on the reg) and yay for islands in the sun. just what this beach bum with a mermaid heart needed.

wishing you all things wonderful and bright this new year! xo

i do what i want

As per A Cup of Jo, a note on flying solo this holiday season:

Good Thing 3: You get to do whatever you want
Don't feel like splitting time between your and a significant other's families? Or going to see the newest action movie on Christmas Day? Great! You don't have to. Do exactly what you want, single friend. Just do you.

In that case, I'm going to get a sunburn. See you ten days Lisa! xx

the fault in our stars

whew lots going on over here; is it due to the full moon in taurus this month?!

or maybe it's because november is the month of healing and completion. 

(how great is that? seriously? making way for the inner light of december, YES.)

it could also be this article. i swear one of these days i'll start an articles club for all my badass babes out there. because, i mean, who has time to read a book? 

(er, well i did just finish this, and returned it to the library ON TIME.)

you know what though, it's probably because this is all i've been listening too. 

(she's the taylor to my swift.)

off to spend some time on my mat during this crazy cool confusing full moon nonsense, it just seems like the right thing to do. 

namaste bitches xx

worth your weight the gold of meditation

this summer season has been one of much time with myself. for myself. by myself. 

it has also been a season of silence; sitting and seeing with my eyes closed.

this has lead to sorting through lots of stuff. deciding what to keep and what to let go of.

meditation is the medication you need to take when you finally sit down to sift through your stuff.

this article perfectly describes what meditation is all about and what it is NOT. so, it's worth the read if you're stuck on a slippery mind you can't seem to catch. 

so cheers to the "summer of stuff". i'm liking what i see.

xx

c

just saying

seriously though. needed this reminder.

tune in tuesday

guys, i'm 30 and i wear $30 undies. that's the sign of a legit woman right? except that i find myself eating a huge helping of crow right now because i can't get enough of kings of leon (UGH. WHAT. IS. MY. LIFE.). i don't know, i'm just saying, the mechanical bull album hit some chord in my soul and i now i can't stop. i even took it on a run last night, and let me tell you it was great.

so, goes to show, old dogs can learn new tricks.

xx
c

two weeks.

i've been thirty for two weeks now. and everything seems pretty much the same. it really is just a number after all. but this post inspired me to write down a few things here that are different (i could write an equally long list of things that aren't - but that's not where i want to focus my energy). so here's what i am doing...imperfectly...bobbing up and down in this ocean we can call life, showing up and doing my work. because that's all we can do. every. damn. day. and i'm here to tell you it's worth it. because from the outside things might look the same as last year but the insides are where it's at anyway, and i'm proud to say i've starting changing that landscape..starting with the way i talk to myself.

i am:
- meditating, almost, daily...even if it's just five minutes. i am learning the power of being present to my feelings, which ultimately grant me freedom from all that s h i t that gets clogged up in your heart and head.

- focusing my energy and thoughts on what i want not on what i don't want.

- practicing compassion towards my self and not just mindfulness. this is like the missing link people. mindfulness + compassion = freedom

- responding to ________________ (fill in the blank with anything) in a way that aligns with my values.

- accepting what is happening in the present moment and understanding that does not mean it's "okay". there is a difference, and that in itself is mindblowing.

- letting go of the stories. they are in the past. focusing instead on how i'm feeling now, instead of rehashing what happened then. knowing full well this is super comforting and safe for my little brain to do. old habits die hard.

- being okay with not being okay.

- being more okay than i actually realize that i am.

- learning i literally have no control over anything. i can make choices, but ultimately things are out of my control. this is hard for a control freak. try that one on for size. thirty or not, it's a big one to get down with.

- listening to myself. because i really do know the answer, it's always in the stillness. that's the catch though, you've got to sit still long enough to hear it.

- becoming my own best friend. because, that's who you've got. all day, err day.

i could probably keep going...or start adding things like - i still can't seem to take vitamins everyday; i'm not thinner; i'm not making more money; i'm not in love - but i am doing my best. that's all anyone can ever ask of you.

so if you made it this far, thanks for reading! wherever you are on your journey i pray that you have the courage to show up, do the work and know you are enough. just as you are. we're all in this together.